On Notice

I’m just taking a poll here.

If, let’s say, your lovely and charming and beautifous wife said to you “My darling husband. I will do ALL the dishes. All the time. I will wash your lunch dishes that you leave lying around. I will wash the water cups that you place beside the sink for the dish washing fairy to wash. Hint (there is no dish washing fairy.) I will do all this with a smile on my face, despite the fact that we both have a one year old and don’t have a dishwasher. Except me.

And you, darling husband, orange to my orange, you only have to do one thing. One small tiny measly thing. EMPTY THE FUCKING DISH DRAINER AND PUT AWAY THE FUCKING DISHES.”

Wouldn’t you do it?

Sigh. This never ever ever ever gets done.

And it is so frustrating.

I am sure I am wrong but I feel like I am working so so so so so so so much harder at keeping the house clean than anyone else IN the house and if I have to continue to clean up after myself, a dog, a cat, a baby AND my husband I might have a break with reality.

So here it is.
I am going on strike. I am NOT washing any dishes, not one single solitary thing, unless there is room in the dishdrainer to put the clean dishes.

I just can’t do it anymore.

And if the dishes pile up on the counter and spill on the floor and have to be put in the bathtub, so be it.

I need help, and I don’t know how else to get it. I have asked nicely, and cajoled, and yelled, but it doesn’t work. So I’m peacefully protesting, and we’ll see how that goes.

The end.

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10 Responses

  1. Good for you. I’ve tried this, and it didn’t work. But maybe that is because I am impatient and went on strike for about an hour before I couldn’t take the messes anymore.

  2. Oh my gosh, I hear ya. I don’t know the solution. I’ve asked Mike to do two things and I’ll do all the rest (keep in mind, we both work full time and I commute further than he does… also, I’m prettier). All I ask is that he take care of all trash needs (make sure the trash cans are at the curb on trash day and not on the curb the rest of the time and keep the trash cans inside manageable). And take care of the floors (all vacuuming and mopping).

    HE CAN’T MANAGE.

  3. Is it possible to get a dishwasher? We have one of those crappy ones that you have to roll across the room and hook up to the faucet with a big hose, but it is so totally worth it. Although then you just fight over the right way to load it.

    (kind of like this one: http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_02211279000P?keyword=portable+dishwasher&vName=Appliances&cName=Dishwashers&sName=Portable+Dishwashers)

  4. It wasn’t about dishes, but it was about my “job” being very different than it used to be, needing some recognition, and he was not getting that through his thick skull. We had to argue four or five times- big long tiring discussion-heavy arguments- before he got even an INKLING of what I was trying to communicate. And then another big fight and the light went on. The strike thing would never work for me (he’d never notice!) and I honestly didn’t know what to do except keep bringing up My Issues over and over… It was, if I may sound really disgusting and obnoxious, a HUGE leap forward in our marriage. Adding a baby to the mix magnified so many things that hadn’t been very big deals…

  5. If I were your husband, I’d fight you to be the dishwasher. I HATE cleaning out the drain and putting the dishes away. HATE HATE HATE it. Good luck.

  6. GO FOR IT!!! And I hope like hell it works! It might… or you might find yourself going out and buying more dishes! I tried it once… I lasted about 3 days before the smell drove me nuts and I caved it……. I still have to pick up dirty dishes that my teenagers leave lying around …. we even have coke with MOULD growing on the top left in glasses in their rooms! Now that is gross!

  7. word, sister. I am in total solidarity with you- I think you will both be amazed at how quickly the dishes pile up, meaning how many friggin’ dishes you do every single day. You guys can then decide to either split the washing or have one person wash and one person unload.

  8. My mom went on strike once when I was little. I remember asking where something was (in the fridge) and she just wouldn’t answer. We all got the point. I’m with you on this one. I can count on my fingers the number of times my husband has emptied the dishwasher, and we’ve been married for over 3.5 years. I don’t currently bitch because he’s in school full time and working 2 jobs, while I have evenings free, but this crap better not continue post degree, dang it! Power to ya, lady!

  9. I truly truly hope it works for you. I tried. He just didn’t care and would live in filth.

    Now he is only in charge of taking out the trash and feeding the fur children. He can’t handle much more than that.

  10. two words: paper plates. Paper bowls, plastic cups, plastic utensils – all great things. When he complains about how much you are spending on said paper goods, then you can smile and say – YOU take care of it then!!

    I prefer the passive-aggressive approach!

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