Mr. E and I have started to fight about buying a car again.  He would really like to get a mini van, and I would really rather die than get a mini van.  And please don’t leave me comments about automatic sliding side doors because any car we can afford to buy is going to be the old kind.  Which also means that right after we figure out how to use the sliding side doors and rave about how convenient they are, they’ll break,  and then we’ll find out it costs 9,000 dollars to fix them and the doors will never work again and we’ll have to get into the stupid car Dukes of Hazzard style.

Anyway.  The other day, I had this flash of insight? And I realized that the car I really really really want is a Mercedes convertible sports car.  In other news, it’s possible I may be in “denial” about my “life situation”.  But doesn’t that sound fun to drive?

We rented a Dodge Tremendously Large Traveling Barge when we went to Orange County and Mr. E loved it.  It made me feel old and sad.  It made me feel like mom hair and elastic waisted jeans came included in the trunk and my assimilation to Total Lameass was just around the corner. I don’t want to drive a Giant Dodge! I want to move to Paris! Or to do something! Fun Sounding and Impractical!

Whenever I tell Mr. E that I want to move to Paris, he tells me he’d rather move to Helsinki.  Unfortunately you will recall that Mr. E got his PhD in “Least Lucrative Thing One Can Learn for Nine Years” which apparently they are not hiring for in Helsinki at this time.  Or Paris, undoubtedly.

Also, please  be aware that it is 100% certain that I Would Haaaaate Paris.  I hate cigarette smoke and weird food and languages I can’t understand and strange cheese and food covered with sauce.  The entire time I was pregnant in France I ordered off the kids menu and asked to be moved to the non smoking section, so chances are they wouldn’t even let me back in anyway.

But I’m still not buying a mini van.


20 Responses

  1. my husband and I fought over getting a minivan. I wanted a minivan. He wanted…. a station wagon. If there is ever a lamer option than a minivan, the station wagon is it.

    I won.

    My minivan kicks ass and has an awesome sound system, which makes me the coolest mom rolling up to pick up my kindergartener, with NWA blasting out the windows.

  2. Ok I KNOW you said not to talk about sliding side doors, but just for the record, even if the automatic mechanism dies or whatevers they can still be opened manually. They just kind of… fight you. I know this because we have a van with sliding doors that works, and my parents have one, same year and model, that doesn’t work, or at least not all the time. It’s annoying, but we don’t actually have to shimmy through windows.
    But I do hate driving a van. Boys never look at me at the stop lights any more. 🙂

  3. I actually prefer my strange food to come covered in sauce. I prefer all my food to come covered in sauce, come to think of it.

    I often daydream about things that are WAY BEYOND my life situation.

  4. snorting!!

    Ok, but really, I know my minivan is like a big neon sign on my forehead that says “suburban mom”, but I’m cool with it, because carpooling and all that other mom stuff is SO MUCH EASIER in a mini-van.

    HOWEVER, I did tell the hubs that as soon as the last one is out of a car seat we’re selling the van and buying an SUV….I will have served my time in a mini van.

  5. My husband refused a minivan (and I agree with him, even though I secretly love all those extra features) and got a Mitsubishi Outlander and it is the BEST COMPROMISE. Seriously, if you choose to get a new “family” car, look into it. And I’ve ridden in the optional 3rd row and it’s not horrendous.

  6. We have a minivan (a Kia, fancy!), and I must say: I love it. I loooooove it. My husband hated it at first but now he also loves it. We don’t care about it getting dirty and it’s large and ugly and horrific. But the boys don’t have to sit next to each other, which means I don’t have to scream at them, “How many times do I have to tell you not to poke your brother in the eye!” for an entire car ride. Worth it.

    And the last time I was in France, I hated it. There was dog poo everywhere and people were mean, and because I have brown skin, they treated me like dirt because they thought we were immigrants. And yet when I see pictures on other people’s blogs of France, I think, “WOW! How gorgeous!” I am dumb.

  7. Did your parents have a minivan? In my experience, people who grew up with a minivan as the family car have much less of a problem getting one when they have kids. I don’t mind minivans at all, but I hate change, so I’m fighting to keep my car at least a few more years…

  8. I think my comment probably got spammed because it had a link. I’ll try to reconstruct. I wouldn’t buy a minivan, either, for only two kids—when we had two kids, we had a Toyota Camry (used) and a Toyota Corolla (used). did an article on the best car makes/models for buying USED, and Toyota was one, but Honda was another and there were a bunch of other maker/models. You can find it online—I don’t know if it’s the same one we used since that was a long time ago, but they keep doing it and updating it.

  9. Suburu Outback?? We drive a Jeep Cherokee… it was the only thing we could both agree on. He wanted a Tahoe. >.<

  10. Please get a Mazda5! It’s cheap! It has sliding doors! They aren’t automatic so you don’t have to worry about them breaking if you buy an older one! It’s small! It’s cute! It’s a fun car! (It is a bit of a dog in that you can’t really zip around with it but whatever.) I’m telling you, check this car out. The kids sit in captain seats! It has a fold down third row! You can fit a stroller in it without folding it or a trike! Get it!!!!

  11. I heard Ford Focus is coming out with a similar car soon but I think the Mazda 5 is really fine.

  12. I admit, I’m biased as I grew up with a minivan. But 3 kids in a regular car means someone sits on the hump. =)

    Now that I’m older, as I see my siblings toting their kids around, the minivan still is the way to go. The Big SUV is too Big and once you have the car seats in the back seat, getting into the 3rd row requires levitation. Same thing with the smaller crossovers.

    And with both of those, the amount of storage you have left to bring the bags, strollers, coolers, etc, is minimal. But in the minivan, you have space for all that and two full bags of golf clubs too.

    And when you have a minivan, then your other car can be your small, two-seater, kid-free, fun-mobile.

    Good luck!

  13. I am resigned to my someday minivan.

    Also, I love to day dream about moving abroad. And then when we talk in any specifics about it, I start having panic attacks. So, you know, I’m the same.

  14. I would rather die than drive a minivan. Ok. Maybe that’s a bit overboard. But MORE POWER TO YOU!! However, we own a VW Passat Wagon and big pink puffy heart it, so maybe I’m not the coolest kid to consult on car choices. 😉

  15. Okay- I weigh in on the Subaru Outback or Forester but the Honda CRV is pretty roomy. I just love my AWD Outback station wagon- it’s great looking, practical and nothing beats it in the snow!

  16. I’m all about zippy little cars. I love my Honda Civic, but with only one kid it’s a non-issue. My SIL just got a Honda CRV but it’s no bigger in the cabin in my opinion.

    Also, I didn’t even know of Helsinski but it looks quite lovely. Much better than Paris. Or was Mr. E saying he’s rather move to Helsinski in a “I’d rather eat glass” sense?

    Back to the car- I’m sure I’m delusional- but I think station wagon-esque cars with racks on the top look sporty…sort of. Have you seen how much shizzle you can fit in the back of a Subaru Outback? Amazing!

  17. I refuse to get a minivan. We have a dodge durango that I’m a big fan of, and because our third row seat folds down in pieces (you can either fold down a one seat section or a two seat section (or both, obvs.)) I don’t foresee needing a mini van unless we end up with triplets or something next time. Even then, I’m pretty sure I could make the durango work.

  18. I hate Paris, but love Helsinki. It’s a beautiful, historic, moody city filled with incredibly tall people. Why no love for Scandinavia?!
    Oh, and our car fight is that I want to drive practical small cars (civic, prius, etc), and he wants a “nice” “sporty” car (saab, bmw, subaru)- I feel that even that would be giving in to the big yuppie car and it makes me sad.

  19. I AM SO WITH YOU ON THIS. Frankly, when my friends act all gleeful that they have finally gotten their “mommy minivan” it makes me sad and a little sick to my stomach. I want no part of that. I will stick with my CRV, thanks very much, which I do understand is not too different but different enough for me. When my boys are 8 and 10ish my husband has been warned that I will be getting my “hot mom” car (ie an Audi of some sort).

  20. What April said. Ick. Will not drive one. (For the record, my mom had one when I was growing up. I think it made me want to have one even less).

    I have a Subaru Outback (a 2006, so the older body style) and I love it. I have a 4yo and an infant. It’s a little snug right now with the seat backwards but should be fine once he’s facing forward. LOVE that car. LOVE.

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